


and i feel naga in this starbucks tonight

by jukeboxing



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff, M/M, One Shot, wingman lissa eyyyyyy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-23
Updated: 2017-09-23
Packaged: 2019-01-04 09:55:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12166593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jukeboxing/pseuds/jukeboxing
Summary: robin works at starbucks and he's very bitter about it... but there's one regular who makes minimum wage worth suffering through.a cynical and hilariously sweet take on coffeeshop au's that i wrote out of spite, initially. rated teen for curse w*rds





	and i feel naga in this starbucks tonight

Robin was working the counter, like every day, and _Gods_ , did he hate this job. Same Starbucks, 6 days a week. The smell of coffee beans dry humping every goddamn day wore out after a while. Being a slave to capitalism was awful, but being a slave to student loans was much worse. There was nary a thing that made him feel anything on the clock anymore, one being his low tolerance for ever-present and horribly enduring foot pain, and the other… well.

Robin had a hand full of regulars, and each their own preference. A girl named Cordelia would get a simple non-fat latte with caramel. The girl at her side, Sumia, would get a vanilla frappuccino with two pumps of raspberry. Those two would usually came in after a workout. Ricken, a high school student, would order a hot chocolate. The law student Maribelle had an extra hot chai tea with skim milk, and her choice of pastry for the day.

A stoic man, Lon’qu, came in once a week to order a black coffee. The one time Robin asked if he would like anything else, he only stared Robin in the eye for a morally repugnant amount of time for anyone who bothered to follow any social etiquettes. He never answered that question. Robin never asked it again.

Regulars like Gaius, Nowi, and Lissa would have drinks that changed every visit, depending on what fucking diabetes-inducing nightmare realm they were planning on stopping by that day. And Gods, Tharja. At first, she ordered iced black coffee. Then, she came in and ordered it again. And again. She came in every day, and Robin could piece together why. After telling her that he believed iced coffee was the absolute  _worst_ sin mankind had ever committed, she never ordered her usual again. Instead, she insisted on _his_ favorite drink. Of course, he didn’t have one. Every refreshment in this 30 ft hell box had worn itself out.  He lied and said a mocha macchiato, just to see if she would drink something a little sweet. As of now, she’s ordered about 200 consecutively.

But those were just the _regulars_. The people he got to know after working at a goddamn _Starfucks_ for 2 years that everyone in Ylisstol visited like a watering hole. There was one thing keeping him going. Practically the singular reason he hadn’t fully committed to drowning himself in coastal waters, releasing himself from coffee and student loans forever: the shining beacon that lit up his shift, that fucking _tall glass of water_ known as Chrom.

That gorgeous, blue haired son of a bitch came in just about every other day, and it took every ounce of strength for Robin not to jump the counter and into his _very_ toned arms. Chrom’s visits were usually short. _Come in, order, leave._ Understandable, really, because Chrom seemed to have a busy life, and no reason to spend 45 minutes in a coffeehouse every morning.

However, there were a few days every couple of weeks when Chrom would come in to study for a few hours. Those days were the highlight of Robin’s fucking _month_. At first, Robin would just allow himself to stare at Chrom for long as he felt didn’t necessitate any form of legal restraint, or otherwise creepy behavior. Eventually, he decided it wouldn’t hurt to actually start a conversation with the guy--which, turned out, was incredibly easy.

Robin barely had to engage him before Chrom was enthusiastically telling Robin about whatever he had, or hadn’t, asked about. It was hard to tell what the original question was, from how Chrom would excitedly jump from one subject to the next. Robin could definitely tell that he was popular in high school, simply by way he talked. He had an easygoing and charming air about him that all guys like him had--the kind of vibe that really screamed, “ _I would’ve been a fantastic addition to the drama club if I hadn’t opted for insert-jock-sport-here._ ”

Every visit, Robin would learn something new about his favorite customer. He learned that Chrom came from a well-off political family, to which he freely admitted being the odd one out. Both of his sisters, in his mind, were much better suited for dinner parties and the like. Despite that, he was working hard in a number of political and business-centered classes at the local University. Unfortunately for Robin, Chrom was actually getting quite a number of good grades, so there were no offers to help him study any time soon.

The last time Chrom came in to study, Robin _somehow_ kept him talking until closing. It was pretty incredible how long Chrom could talk about any given subject, much to the chagrin of Robin’s coworkers. On that particular night, Chrom was captivating Robin with the _batshit insane_ story of how he ended up breaking a guy’s _goddamn leg_ at the county fair. To top it off, he apparently became friends with the guy after visiting him in the hospital. Vaike, he called him.

That night was 5 weeks ago. Upon his next visit, Chrom remarked that he somehow never actually got down to studying when he was in, so he opted for the library instead. Horribly enough for Robin, they were on about a 35 day long stalemate.

 

x

 

It was only 8am, but if Robin had to hear one more of his coworkers correct a customer’s use of  the word _large_ for _VENTI_ , he might very well cut his losses, quit, and firmly shove the espresso machine up the manager’s ass.  While Robin was non-committedly pondering how this scenario would play out, that blue-haired beauty steps up to the counter.

 _Hell fucking_ **_yes_** , Robin thought as he confirmed the man before his eyes. Chrom never came in on a set schedule. Sure, he visited multiple times a week, but never a specific time or day. His schedule was sporadic, and sometimes Robin thought it depended on the fucking _wind speed_ he’d come in so unreliably. But all that was fine. One look at his fucking ManCrushEveryday had all the stress of the morning off his shoulders in a heartbeat.

“What’ll it be today, then?” Robin let an amused smile cross his face. Chrom may come in all the time, but what he’d order was anyone’s guess. Some days a fruity tea, some days a “beverage” that had to be roughly 99% composed of sugar. Even, occasionally, an iced coffee that physically hurt to put into the register.

“Any recommendations this morning?” Chrom smiled back at him.

Robin frowned. “You know I can’t recommend anything here. I can’t even recommend being within 5 miles of this establishment.”

“Impossible. I wouldn’t survive.” Chrom says in mock-seriousness. “Well, I’ll just have a black coffee, then. And whatever sugary concoction you can stir up. Make it _very_ sweet.”

“Two drinks today?” Robin looked up from the register. For a man of Chrom’s stature, two drinks wasn’t out of the question, but that kind of odd combination…? A girl, probably. Seemed like it really _was_ the day Robin would be proceeding with his plans for that espresso machine.

Chrom breezily gestured to his side. “You know what my sister likes, right?”

 _What in the goddamn._ Lissa was standing right next to Chrom. Of course it was Lissa. Not many people put in a request for the most sugary thing Starbucks has to offer. Robin knew that he was head over heels for the guy, but he didn’t think that his beautiful face would comprise so much of his visual spectrum as to block out an entire fucking person standing not 3 feet away.

“Oh--oh, yeah. I do,” Robin sputtered out. He punched in a few more things before completing Chrom’s order. Robin waved to Lissa as they left the line, feeling guilty for not noticing her before. It was painful to see Chrom leave him after such a short and unsatisfying interaction... but at least he got to look at his ass.

 

x

 

Robin didn’t even have to look at the clock to know that it was about 1pm when Lissa came speed walking her fucking damndest into the coffeehouse. He spent so much time looking out the window, wishing he were _anywhere_ else, that he had the sun practically memorized.

“ _Robin, listen_ ,” She spoke low and harsh. “My brother is going to walk through that door any second, and you’re gonna give him your number.”

“Lissa, _what_?” Robin’s tone was cool, but his mind was racing. “ _Give him my number?_ Did--did he ask?” He could feel the heat rising in his face.

“He didn’t need to, moron! You two have been dancing around each other for as long as you’ve worked here! I’m sick of watching it!” Lissa continued speaking harshly, “You didn’t even notice me last time we came in, did you?! You were too busy looking all lovey at Chrom’s man-face, huh?”

Robin flushed harder. “Lissa, I can’t--”

The door chime rings. This was probably the first time ever he felt horrified seeing Chrom’s beautiful face. Robin stood stiff as Chrom made his way over to the register.

“Robin! I’m glad we didn’t come in on your day off. How’re the beans today?” Chrom’s voice was clear and bright.

“Uh, they’re--good,” Robin smoothed out his apron in an attempt to wipe the sweat off his palms. He was completely flustered because of Lissa. _What the hell,_ he thought. _Everyone knows your crush never likes you back. You just get crushes on people, never act on them, then die._

Of course he wanted to go out with Chrom, but how the hell would he ask him out on the clock? Robin wasn’t the smooth type to put his number on a frappuccino cup with a wink, because he was a fucking person, not a Hallmark movie. Plus, if his manager saw him chasing dick while being paid, he wouldn’t see a raise for months.

“They’re good?” Chrom’s chuckling brought him back to reality. “Then, you like the coffee here again.”

“Not in a million years,” Robin scoffed back. “I would sooner find glass appetizing than drink a liquid hospital bill.”

Chrom laughed again. Robin was always amazed at how at ease Chrom made him. In no less than a moment, Chrom made Robin’s nervousness completely dissipate. But in it’s place, a different feeling was manifesting. It was as if Chrom filled a cavity in his chest that he didn’t know he had. And now that Lissa mentioned the fact that asking people out is totally, 100% an option, it almost hurt having to be apart at all.

“What’ll you have today?” Robin set aside his feelings for a minute to punch in their order.

“Wha--Lissa didn’t put it in?” Chrom turned around and furrowed his brow at Lissa. She shrugged. “That’s why she ran ahead of me… or so she said, I suppose.” Chrom scratched his neck and put in the order.

Robin let his mind wander for the next couple of minutes. Chrom was _right there_ , looking handsome as always, totally ready to be asked out. Robin had also... received Lissa’s blessing? So, there really was no reason not to jump head first into Hallmark territory. He thought about the past two years at this godforsaken place, and how long it took to even get to a first name basis with the man of his dreams. There was an apprehension to ruining that progress. Robin had ruined friendships before, but this was something different. Something much more, “ _we barely even know each other, what’s he gonna think of the weird coffee guy asking him out on a date out of nowhere?_ ” Chrom was practically the only reason he could stand to work in this hellhole. If Robin screws this up, there’s no reason not to quit… then never see him again. That thought made his chest hurt. If it’s such a big risk, why take it at all? Wouldn’t things be better if he could at least--

“Order up.”

 _Shit._ Their order was done. It was do or die time, and apparently, Robin chose the latter. He didn’t even need to call their names before Chrom was walking up to the counter with his stupid gorgeous smile. This coffeehouse was small, and the two siblings always stuck close by.

“Thank you again, Robin,” Chrom smiled as he picked up his drink in one hand and Lissa’s in the other. Robin shot a look at Lissa, who widened her eyes threateningly as she gestured towards her brother, egging Robin to do something. Robin clenched his hands.

“Hey--I-- _Gods_ , let me see that for a sec,” Robin snatched Chrom’s drink out of his hand before he could protest. Of course, it was only now that Robin noticed that Chrom ordered a _mother fucking_ iced coffee. _And this is the person I’m attracted to? What the absolute fuck am I thinking?_ Robin thought as he aggravatedly uncapped a sharpie and quickly scrawled something on the side of Chrom’s cup. He practically shoved it back towards Chrom as he felt his face getting redder by the second.

“Here. My number. I’m off in an hour, if that helps.” Robin couldn’t look Chrom in the eyes.

“Wha--Really? Alright!” Chrom’s genuine tone made Robin look up in disbelief. This was _not_ supposed to work, yet the guy he’d pined over for who knows how long was sporting his biggest and dorkiest smile yet. “I’ll text you right now so you’ll have my number. You can just, uh, text me when you get off?”

To Robin’s disbelief, he felt his phone buzz in his back pocket. “Y-yeah, okay…” He was so fucking astonished that he couldn’t process the situation properly. “Yeah, I’ll text you.”

“Alright! Then, uh, see you?” Chrom was walking backwards towards the door, still wearing that huge grin. Lissa was following his pace while pointing approving finger guns back at Robin. Robin just waved as they headed out the door, keeping his eyes on Chrom as long as possible.

Robin let out a very big sigh that had been held in by his nerves for far too long. _I am never dissing a Hallmark movie again._

 

**Author's Note:**

> this is the first true blue original ship fanfic that ive ever written?! i hope its good...! 
> 
> i dont know why robin hates iced coffee so much. i, for one, love it.
> 
> special thanks to my twin sis who helped me critique and proof read tf out of this fic, and who laughed at all the stupid jokes i put in it, and who loves gay chrobin as much as i do.


End file.
